I love books. I.LOVE.BOOKS. This past week I found myself lusting for books (and I was only at SAMS). My heart was beating a bit faster, and I was definitely salivating. Did I say that I love books? Perhaps this stems from growing up without a TV. If so, do I thank my parents, or should I, in some odd way, feel a little cursed?
I actually didn't even realize that I had this problem, until I participated in our most recent women's Bible study at church. On the first day, we were encouraged to give up something that we love. I can't give up Charlie. I won't give up my animals (also family members). Ooooooooooooo.....don't ask me to do this. I put my pinkie toe in the water. I hear a voice. "Just do it". I close my eyes and dive in. No buying of books thru Easter. There, I said it.
The following week, others share about what they have decided to give up. I keep my mouth shut because:
A) they will probably laugh,
B) they would probably not understand how hard of a proposition this is.... and,
C) what if I can't keep this commitment? (and I pride myself on keeping commitments).
Aside from animals, books are my Achille's heel. They are to me what shoes and purses are to some other women. It is darn hard for me to walk past a bookstore without going in. Once I'm inside, I am mere putty. So many choices. Time stops, and the books are calling my name.
I love the heft of a book; the smell, even of a musty old one; the feel of the pages. History. Fiction. Non-fiction. Educational.Big books. Little books. I don't understand how anyone could forgo the "experience" of a book for The Kindle (a sacrilege to a true bibliophile). The characters in books (both fiction and nonfiction) become friends, and I am often sad to see a book end. I probably should have been a librarian instead of a pharmacist :). I am in awe of truly gifted writers and their abilities to make the words come alive on a page.
Last week, I broke down and told Charlie what I had committed to do. He laughed at me, because he DOES know how much I love books. He has frequently said he can trust me in any store (because I am Miss Frugal), except in a bookstore. I suppose there are worse addictions.
This has been an eye opening event for me. I knew I loved books, but I honestly thought I "had 'IT' under control". When I was in SAMS, it had been a month since I'd bought a book, and I think DT's had set in. I picked up about a dozen books on display. I ran my hands across the covers. I thought about all the friends hiding between the pages. I even read the back flaps. I was so close. I almost put one book in my cart. But then, I heard that voice: "You promised". I put the book back on the shelf, backed away, and wiped the drool from my face, with the realization that I do have a little problem exercising control when it comes to buying books. Maybe after Easter, I thought, bidding farewell to my future little friends.
I post all of this with humor, but unfortunately, it rings true to anything that grips us somewhere in our lives....whether that be the internet, our cell phones, food, etc......or books. I have discovered that even a "healthy thing" like being a book lover, can become unhealthy when you feel compelled to own every book that catches your fancy.
So, for now, I look forward to Easter, for many reasons. But in the meantime, does it count if someone loans me a book? :)
This is a tale with a happy ending. Radar is one of our foundlings. He is a Highway 121 dog. A dump. Your fairly common typical lab mix. He initially was a rescue back in 2000, and we almost found a home for him several times. Each time, the placement home fell thru, and we grew a bit more attached to his lovable, doting, intensely loyal, intelligent, unwavering steadfast personality. He is typical, but he is not. We almost lost him on Febuary 7th. Charlie called me at work on Friday. Radar was not feeling well. His symptoms: not eating, lethargic, and trembling. I advised him to drop whatever he was doing, and to take him to the vet immediately. I am not an alarmist, but I do know my animals, and I know when something is very wrong, even over the phone. Radar is stoic. He rarely shows discomfort, is never short on energy, and he NEVER turns away food. Trembling would mean either intense pain or some sort of muscle spasms. Our vet, David, was very concerned. He admitted him, and started him on fluids, antibiotics, pain medication, an anti-emetic, and began the methodical process of eliminating what it was NOT, in an attempt to try to determine what exactly "it" was. Over the next 2 days, Radar was xrayed, sonogrammed, and tested for just about every possible malady known to dog-dom. Nothing matched his symptoms, and things were getting worse. Additionally, for some reason, he was producing no urine, indicating that his kidneys were ceasing to function properly. Our poor boy's cells were literally drowning in their excess fluid, and his electrolytes were starting to swing wildly. David told us all of this on a late Saturday evening phone call. David knows us well, and he knows how much we love our animal family. He also knows we are stable, logical, and educated in the ways of the animal health. Because of this, he is always honest and forthright,even when the news is not positive. This call was not a good one. He indicated that if there was not improvement by Sunday, we would be needing to think about ending Radar's trauma. We ended the call with the understanding that he would be in touch with us if any changes should occur, good or bad. Charlie and I were in shock. Literally, not 48hrs prior, Radar had been his normal happy self. We both spent a very restless night thinking about our sweet dog, and praying that he would make it thru the night. Sunday morning, we had not heard yet from David, so we headed to church. It was my day to work in the nursery for the early service, but truthfully, I really wanted to be up at the vet clinic sitting with Radar. I didn't much feel like being where I was at that moment. One of my friends came by the nursery and very innocently asked how everything was going. I'm sure she meant on "the nursery level", and didn't expect the copious tears that came with my explanation of Radar's dire predicament. Cynda, my nursery partner and dear friend, immediately came to my side and said, "We are going to pray for Radar, right now." And she did. Aloud. .....I cannot remember the exact prayer, but it was beautiful, and it was heartfelt, and I knew that she was not just praying for me, but was also lifting Radar up for a healing of the heavenly variety. It was a prayer that calmed my heart.
It is sometimes lonely to be the "to the core of my being" animal lover that I am, because I know not everyone shares my closeness with the beasts of the world, and I don't expect people to really understand my feelings of grief when an animal is in danger or pain. I know and understand that people and animals are on a different plane of existence, but that doesn't mean that animals do not have feelings and true needs that deserve to be met. Basic needs such as food, shelter, water, and yes, love. Proverbs 12:10 says, "A wise man cares for the needs of his animals." Biblically, I believe that we are going to have to answer to God some day for all that we have been given stewardship. This includes how we treat creatures that belong to us, and also those that we see being treated inhumanely......but do nothing about. If the word of God states (more than once) that He cares for the sparrows, why would he not care for the dogs, cats, chickens, cows, horses, etc? Anyway, I digress...sorry about that! :). Back to my story............
Well, we wrapped up the morning in the nursery, and I headed out to go to the second service with Charlie. My cell phone rang. It was David. He said, "Well, I'm not quite sure what happened, but Radar is suddenly acting like he feels better. I did not expect him to make it thru the night last night, and when I came back this morning, he didn't look any better. However, he just peed. ALOT. I re-ran the tests, and already his BUN and creatinine levels are decreasing. I think he's going to make it." You can bet I hopped in the truck and headed up to the clinic to see our recovering boy. I missed church, but I think God understood.
As I write this, 3 weeks after the event, Radar is fine. We ran more precautionary tests on him, but everything came back normal. 2 days after he nearly died, he was completely back to his old self. David has no explanations as to what went wrong or why. I'm ok with that. He also has no explanation as to why Radar recovered so rapidly. I do. Prayer......it works. Even for a dog.
Today, January 28th, would have been my Grandma's 92nd birthday. She died in 1998, and I think I still miss her as much now as I did shortly after she died. Grandma was my Dad's mom. She grew up in a sod house, got married at 17, and had my father when she was 18. Her husband left her when she was probably 21, with 2 young children to care for. She remarried a few years later, and had 3 more boys......5 in all. A Wyoming girl. She was generous, amazingly frugal, and practical. She was able to make a tasty meal for 7 with a few potatoes and a little ham (see her soup recipe below). She loved animals. She gave me this love, along with my blonde hair, and dry hands in the winter. Grandma was kind to strangers and to others that society might have otherwise discarded. I spent most of my young summers in her little house on the prairie (literally!), chasing horses and wild bunnies. I learned from her that you can get a good meal from KMart's blue plate special (or used to, anyway), that a good bargain was a victory, and that you can make do with less than what you thought you could. Grandma never had a dishwasher, and when her grown boys tried to buy her one, she declined, saying, "This is the only time I have alone to think".I understand, and it is a rare dishwashing experience that I don't think about her when I handwash dishes, pots, and pans. I miss her calling me "Lizbeth" or "Honey girl". She believed in me no matter what, and I would call her weekly when I was in college and beyond to give her my life's updates. I still do send her updates....just not by phone :). So, happy birthday, Grandma! I sure do miss you. With love, Lizbeth
Grandma Scott's Tater Soup
6-8 medium sized cubed red potatoes 4-6 sticks of celery 1 diced medium onion 1 cup of diced ham 1/2 cup butter 1 can of corn (either cream style or whole kernel is fine) salt and pepper to taste 1 can of evaporated milk to add at the very end.
cook onion and celery in butter until cooked. Add ham about half way thru. Add rest of ingredients to pot (except for evaporated milk). Add just enough water to "fill in the gaps" of the ingredients, but not covering the ingredients. Simmer until potatoes are soft and done. Add evaporated milk, and serve with oyster crackers (If you can still find them!). Enjoy!
We are 3 days into our Siberian Express cold snap, and things are cooooold around here! How cold is it? I think our low has been 9 degrees during this Texas weather oddity.
Cold enough that 40 degrees sounds balmy.
Cold enough to freeze some pipes under our pier and beam house. (Prayers for no damage would be greatly appreciated!)
Cold enough to have to break ice on all the water troughs at least twice a day. Cold enough that the cats take turns sitting in front of the heater in their "warm rooms". (In this picture, it's Eli's turn...)
Cold enough that you could walk across the pond. (I was just a few feet out in this picture...I'm not brave enough to walk all the way across!)
Cold enough that our pond looks like it belongs in Nova Scotia, and there is some amazing ice art out there.
Cold enough that you get TWO blogs from me in 10 days. (Now that's cold....it means I'm spending too much time indoors on my days off!)
It is about 34 degrees outside today, but if there are chores to do on a farm, they must get done no matter the weather. The animals are lively and rambunctious. The dogs and Leo the Wonder Kitty have been following us around as we tackle "the list".
Leo takes it upon himself to become the lead scout, in search of......what, you may ask? Maybe the next best thing to tuna fish? Slowly, his focus turns to me. I see intent. I see resolve. I (very briefly) see his invisible cape.
"NO!" I shout. I duck.....just in time. Sorry, I was too busy ducking to catch the fleeting shot of his cape flying in the wind. But Leo the Wonder Kitty hit his mark.....
The next best thing to tuna? A big dog with his winter blanket on. Otherwise known as Leo's bareback pad. (the better to hang on with claws don'tcha know). Gotta love this kitty of mine, and his (much bigger) buddies.
From all of us at Ararat Acres- two, three, and four legged........fuzzy, furry, and feathery.....We Wish You a Merry Christmas!
We wish you peace, happiness and joy. Remember the real reason for this season. Jesus Christ.
Blessings to All with love from,
Charlie and Liz;Cajun, Bear, Radar, Kelly, Foster & Miel (the dogs); Indy, Karma, Leo the Wonder Kitty, Victoria, Pounce, Eli, Leroy, Ellie Mae, Molly, and Thyme (the kitties); Lola, Waco, Cheyenne, Katie, Earl, Maggie, Murphy, and Elvis (the horses); Piggy Sue (self explanatory!); Basil the Bunny and all of his chicken friends & George the Turkey and his friends, the Guineas.
I have spent many thoughtful moments this last month reflecting on 2009, and my what a tumultuous year this has been at Ararat Acres. We have had several bouts of "not so good" events, lots of stress, moments of unsureness and insecurities, financially panicky moments.....not a stellar year for the faint of heart. But after all the rubble is cleared, and the superficiality life is so wont to adorn us with is stripped away....I have to say that while this has not been an enjoyable year, it has been life altering and soul strengthening. Let me explain.
On February 4th, we lost our youngest horse, Dooley, in a freak accident. I was devastated and heartbroken. God knows better than I as to why Dooley's life ended, but I believe He knew I wasn't going to have the time and energy to train this young guy any time soon. That, and He needed another sweet horse in heaven.
As we entered 2009, the US economy was well into its decline. Charlie was wrapping up the end of the enormous apartment project that he had been building, and we knew that his employer did not have any new local projects in the pipelines. On April 2nd, he was laid off. I am so thankful to have parents who taught me to work hard, save money like a squirrel, and keep debt to a minimum, and that I have been able to share this wisdom and knowledge with Charlie throughout our married life. This background and foundation readied us with the skills and budgeting we needed for the coming months.
At the end of April 2009, Charlie was eating lunch at a local cafewhen someone came rushing in to let the patrons know that a truck was on fire outside. It was Charlie's truck, and the battery had caught fire (yes, while parked and not running). His truck was totaled by the insurance company. It was an older truck, but a good one. We doubted we would be able to afford to replace it with a similar truck because of our recent cut in household income. Yet, we were blessed by the insurance company. With the money we received, we were able to purchase a nearly identical truck truck with almost 100K less miles on it. We even had some money left over, AND our insurance premium did not rise. Praise God!
In May, I lost my most precious, beloved cat, Oliver. He was 17 years old, and he shared my pillow every night. He had developed the cat's version of irritable bowel syndrome and was literally wasting away before our eyes. Multiple trips to the vet, medications, tests...nothing altered the path his life was on, and we had to make the painful decision to put him to sleep. Oliver was perhaps the best, most devoted cat I have ever had the pleasure of knowing, and losing him left a gaping, lonely void in my heart....not to mention a pillow that was now much too big for one head to sleep on. Our dear vet came out (as they always do for us), and I was able to say goodbye in peaceful surroundings. Sweet Oliver. He gave me the final gift of laying on my lap and purring, right up until the moment that his little heart quit beating. That memory is bittersweet, but cherished. He was at peace, and I am ever so thankful for having had his life in mine.
Throughout the spring and early summer, Charlie looked for employment in the construction industry, but was unsuccessful. Construction in Dallas remains stagnant at best, even now...in December. I am thankful that I have a husband who is a "Go Getter". Who doesn't wallow in self-pity. Who has hands that can create and build. Who is game to try almost anything. I am also thankful for our dear friends who needed (at just the right time, I might add) a large greenhouse built.....giving our household budget a little boost, and allowing Charlie's hands to remain busy and productive.
Spattered,scattered, and smeared throughout this year, has been my "new" work life. In my "old" work life, I worked roughly 30hrs per week at my real job, and moonlighted at my "other" real job in retail pharmacy and then managed day to day chores and activities around here on the farm on my days off......which in itself is really a full time (but most gratifying and joy filled!) job. Life has changed for me. Coincidentally(?), about the time that Charlie lost his job, my job went from normal, to busy, to mandatory overtime crazy busy, to **I must be a lunatic to still work here**busy. The hours were nuts, and I must say, so was I. Working 60-65 hrs per week at a job that demands 100% perfection taxes the soul. Being away from home as much as I am now steals the time I need to refill my "joy cup" when working outdoors with the animals. I am rarely a "cryer", yet I find myself tearing up at things I normally find only minimally stressful or emotional. It is December now, and although things aren't perfect at work, they are do-able and they are (mostly) bearable and I have survived. For I can do all things thru Christ who strengthens me.
At the beginning of "The Impending Financial Crisis at Ararat Acres", I prayed that Charlie would quickly find another job, and that God would show me better ways to watch and manage money, above and beyond what we already did. We also made a commitment that, in faith, we would continue to tithe at the level we had when we were a two income household. Charlie and I were blessed at the onset of this life season by being prepared financially, having only our mortgage (which is reasonably priced), our monthly living expenses, and taxes. Having as many mouths to feed and care for as we do, this can get costly very quickly. We have nipped and tucked. We have liposuctioned our lives wherever financially necessary. We have adjusted and we have learned to do without. I even have a few more "emergency" measures up my sleeve that can be taken if absolutely necessary. This year hasn't been easy for either of us, financially, emotionally, or physically.AndI will admit that I have had moments of bitterness and frustration. Weeping, wailing, and gnashing of teeth when things didn't happen as I had imagined. I do think God would rather hear us ranting and raving to Him, than not talking to him at all! And, what I was reminded is this: God doesn't always answer prayers in the way we think they should be answered.
Although Charlie is working side jobs to bring in some money, we are still virtually a one income family. So, how in Heaven's Name have we been able to pay every single bill, all taxes due, mortgage payments, and feed bills, not just on time, but ahead of time this year? How is it that we've even had "excess" money....enough to bless a few other people who needed it more badly than we did at that moment? How is it that we've been able to continue to tithe at our prior level of commitment? All of this without touching our savings. Believe me. The money hasn't fallen magically from the sky. We've worked to keep our heads above water this year. Way hard. Harder than the average bear. But He gave us the way and the skills to do this via paths that did not exist before we needed them. The Lord Provides, although it may not be the way you or I want it done. I will be leaving 2009 and embracing 2010 knowing that as long as I trust and believe in Him, He will sweat out the details on my behalf. I know these things for sure. Who knows. Maybe in 2010 my life lesson will be on better capturing that elusive creature, Joy.
